The return of the quotable quotes

Since high school, I've been the supreme keeper of quotable quotes. Pored over my notebooks while spring cleaning and found some from my college teachers. Here are a few of them (long stories and R-rated ones excluded).

In this class, we encourage insanity.
I'll be your psycho teacher. You'll be my psycho students. It's a two-way street.
[I am] handsome, contrary to popular belief.
It is hard to determine love juridically.
Benzene is the component of rugby, glue that smells very *sniff* nice.
Mice are nice and handy. You can grow them.
[On grades] Zero if you're beating around the bush and it's the wrong bush.
[Another teacher's name] is one of the great yellers of this university.
How come nobody loves me? I have love to give.
I have everything in my Palm Pilot, including my sins.
My neighbors used to eat all my dogs.
[Quiz] Bonus question: what is the latest single of my band?
I lost my glasses so funky yung mga images na nakikita ko.
Give me... wag naman SPACE. Para namang may relationship tayo.
This is what I like about the MWF class... madaling matapos.
Life is shit talaga.
Girls are what boys want, what young men get, and what old men like me only dream of.